Amish Young Folks and Marriage

After graduation from grade school at age 14, young folk continue to learn as they work side by side "apprenticing" with their parents. Boys learn how to build houses, farm, shoe horses, and much more. Girls learn quilting, canning, sewing clothes, gardening, and more. Having watched my own two children go through high school and even college and somehow graduating without any REAL transferable skills in the job place, I often wonder if maybe the Amish realize something we have lost. Parents, not bound by company timeclocks, have time to pass along their wisdom and skills to their children. Parents, not the schools or teachers, have the primary responsiblity of educating their children.

Some Amish groups practice a tradition called rumspringa ("running around"). Teens aged 16 and older are allowed some freedom in behavior. Since they have not yet been baptized, they have not committed to follow the extremely strict behavioral restrictions and community rules imposed by the religion. The intent of rumspringa is to make certain that youth are giving their informed consent if they decide to be baptized. Actually in this community, the young folk are not really given that much freedom, but they are allowed to take their buggies out at night, try a cigarette, and maybe drink a beer. So they do not really get that much contact with the outside world. About 99% of the young Amish people in this community decide to remain Amish probably due to their very strong family ties. Also, because of their sheltering, most of them would not know how to exist outside of their community.

The "Young Folks", as they are called by the Amish, usually have get-togethers on Sunday evenings rotating places amongst the church families. During these gatherings, the young people have supper, sing, and socialize. After the formal gathering, some couples take leisurely buggy rides and get home quite late.

Marriages outside the faith are not allowed. In addition, marriages are not allowed between first cousins. (This often limits the number of available mates in their own community.) Gatherings are planned for young folk to get together with others from similarly minded Amish groups. Couples who plan to marry are "published" usually only a few weeks before the ceremony. Their weddings are large community all-day events with usually around 500 people in attendance. I personally have attended several weddings and usually end up feeling like I am immersed into a sea of black hats and clothing.